Monday, May 4, 2009

true blood. meh. rant.

I just finished watching the HBO series True Blood on my PVR. (Ranty spoilers ahead, for those who don't want to know.)

Hooray! for vampires on mainstream tv. We need more of it.

That's where my delight in this series ended. Two words: WHINY HEROINE.

God, she's awful. I just wanted to punch her from scene 2, ep one, and it didn't get better. I'm sure she can't be like that in the books, or they wouldn't be such a hit.

TV Sookie invades people's privacy and then complains like a squashed skunk when people do the same to her. She complains all the time without a thought for any one else's problems. And even though she's almighty perky (my, is she perky. TV Sookie: hey, bar patron whom I so clearly think I'm better than, can you see how perky I am? No? Can I push my titties out just a little more? See now? No? How's about I wiggle my tush? Get it now? Great. kthxbai) if a guy should find her attractive, that's a mortal sin. What a be-yatch.

TV Sookie is the Thought Police. News flash, Sookie: people are entitled to think what they like, even if it offends your virginal little sensibilities.

Oh yeah. Did I not mention she's a virgin? Riiiiight.

And she's so self-absorbed. Everything has to be about her. Example: ep 2, where Bill tastes her blood for the first time.

TV Sookie: "Do I taste different to everyone else?"

Spew. I was so hoping Bill would say, no, actually, you're common as dirt, girl :)

And what's with dressing up in a white nightie and running out into the forest? What a princess.


The series wasn't a total loss. Redeeming features:

1) Bill. He's a clumsy fool, but he's kinda cool. This actor makes a much better vampire in Ultraviolet, btw. See:
2) Eric. Cool, built, wears muscle shirts (!), takes no shit, makes fun of Bill, thinks Sookie is a waste of space, girly hair that I adore. Nuff said.

3) Lafayette. Sassy. Alas, he's no more.

4) Rene being the killer. I like Rene. Pity he didn't kill Sookie too. Stay in the grave, Sookie.

Rant over. I was disappointed. I'll get over it. And, I'll probably watch Season Two. Even if just to see Eric in that muscle shirt again.

That's enough outa me -- what did you guys think of this series? Hit or miss?

Saturday, May 2, 2009

tonight, my love

A shout-out for my friend 's newest release: Tonight, My Love from Spice Briefs.

It's an eerie, sexy little tale with a killer twist. Here's the blurb:

"Tonight, my love, the choice is yours," Andrew Campbell tells Isabelle as they ride through the streets of Whitechapel to select a prostitute to join them in bed. Her choice: Franny, a pretty young girl hesitant to go with the genteel couple with Jack the Ripper on the loose.

Yet the lure of money and food is too strong for Franny. Before long, she is in their bed...with Andrew and Isabelle fulfilling their promise to take Franny to the height of sexual ecstasy.

But once their pleasure is complete, Andrew and Isabelle have another surprise in store for her....

Friday, May 1, 2009

tweet me, baby

I've joined Twitter!! 

Yeah. Because there were just too many hours in the day.

Come chat with me @ericahayes.

Because, you know. You can.